As you begin planning for the summer holiday, consider taking a family vacation from social media for a little while. There are positives and negatives to using social media and if you ask pre-teens and teens they will tell you it is an important part in their daily life, Our goal can be to help them see and experience a freedom in signing out for a while or taking a break..
Research on the effects of social media and teens is growing. It shows that social media have significant impacts individuals' mental health, body image, sleep, relationships, information sources, and idea of what life "should" look like. The pressures of posting only "perfect" photos or making sure one's online life looks fun and exciting at all times is difficult. Your child will likely not be excited about the idea of a break, which would mean breaking their "streak" on Snapchat, FoMo (Fear of Missing out), or the social repercussions that absent from their chat groups might mean. However, the benefits of not having to worry about getting enough "likes" on each post, or not being compelled to reply to your group chat's within the expected timeframe can be freeing emotionally and mentally. Some research shows that it is less anxiety inducing for teens if he/she makes the decision for him/herself to take the break. Perhaps choose one or two apps that are most used to take the break from; or select a day of the week to stay off media; or plan an activity with friends in-person and agree to leave the phones turned off as a group. If teens need help with what to tell their friends, parents can coach them to let their friends know in advance that they will be away from wifi or that parents are setting a social media blackout period. Below are a few articles related to taking a break from social media.
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5 Ways to Organize Your Phone to Unhijack Your Mind (article link) An easy to read article with some quick tips to try. How many times have we been frustrated by the actions or words of others? Everyone has, at one time or another, thought, "I wish he would just..." or "She makes me so mad...". We spend energy on the things we cannot control and are not necessarily sure how to change things things for the better. The following article from Ideas.Ted.Com entitled, How to be More Helpful, by Kara Cutruzzula, includes a number of TedTalks which related to the idea of taking control, looking for the positive and making the best of unexpected situations. A big concern for parents and educators is how to keep kids safe online, how to regulate screen time and technology use, and what boundaries they should set. The following websites have a wealth of resources for parents. Talk with your child about what they are doing to keep information private, to safely store passwords and how they are deciding what is safe to post. Make family guidelines and rules and ask children to show you their social media sites from time to time.
Common Sense Media A range of information and quick videos for parents; current terminology used by kids online; information about websites, games and even movies; and much more. https://www.commonsensemedia.org/parent-concerns Smart Parents Does and Don'ts guide for upper primary-early middle school. https://www.smartparents.sg/child/social-and-life-skills/9-social-media-dos-and-don-ts-for-junior-8902646 Apps that Hide Apps Do you know what a Vault or Ghost App is? It is an app that looks safe and would not get a parent's attention, but actually can hid other apps. Check out a few that students are using. https://www.huffingtonpost.com/denise-lisi-derosa/how-to-find-vault-photo-a_b_8522076.html Kids, Safety and Social Media by Huffington Post Lots of great resources and links to other articles. https://www.huffingtonpost.com/denise-lisi-derosa/kids-safety-and-social-me_b_9176810.html Talking with Teens and Pre-teens is a complex issue. We had some great discussions at the January Conversation with Counsellor sessions on this topic. As parents and educators we need to have many tools in our toolbox when it comes to communication because what works one day for one teen, may not work the next day. If you were unable to make a session, you can find the handout on the Counselling section of our http://isssupportforfamilies.weebly.com website. Active Listening and establishing the habit of providing a safe place for your child to talk is the first step. The following New York Times article highlights many of the same points we discussed such as listening, without judgment and without offering advice. This helps create a safe place where teens feel they can share what is on their minds. Sometimes people (teens and adults) just need someone to listen. This type of active listening is difficult for adults to do because we have experiences and wisdom we want to share. However, allowing space for teens to talk through their own ideas out loud can help build their confidence, resilience and independence, which are skills we ultimately want them to have as functioning adults. Our next Conversation with Counsellors is on 13 March 8;30am or 6:00pm on the topic of Empowering Parents. https://nyti.ms/2hBonqM
The IB Learner Profile qualities that we are focusing on for the month of January is that of a Risk Taker.
The following article suggests the idea that risk-taking may have a role in teen happiness.
www.rootsofaction.com/why-risk-taking-may-increase-teens-happiness/ Does this interaction sound all too familiar in your house? |
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February 2022
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